+ + 二〇二五年六月十日

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+ + + 二〇二五年六月十日 + + +

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头盔塑料面罩边缘积了一圈水，沉甸甸的。

我根本没在意雨是什么时候开始下的。毛毛雨，烦人得很，打不湿衣服，但能糊一脸。

脑子里塞满了刚加完班的疲惫、明天还要继续做的项目，还有路口那家可能还没关门的便利店中的泡面。

抬头看向漫长红灯的时候，视线边缘笼罩了一层光。

那圈水好像活了。

不是流动的水，是光。四面八方，路口乱七八糟的路灯、对面刺眼的车灯、旁边店铺招牌的霓虹……所有乱七八糟的光，像被磁铁吸住的铁屑，全挤进了那圈浑浊的水渍里。

它们在里面搅动、融合、炸开，又坍缩成一片无法形容的、晃动的、极其刺眼的绚烂。

这光不是在正前方，是在视线的边缘，余光扫到的角落。

可偏偏是这片余光，像一张湿透的糖纸蒙住了我的整个世界。

我好久没吃糖了。

车流声、雨点打在头盔上的哒哒声、旁边电动车不耐烦的喇叭声，全被这片无声的、在视线边缘燃烧的光吸走了。

我感觉自己不是停在潮湿黏腻的十字路口，而是悬在某个光怪陆离的隧道口。

身体很轻，脑子里那些塞得满满当当的烦心事，被这强光瞬间蒸发、漂白了。

时间没了刻度，只剩下那片在头盔边缘疯狂跳动的光河。

一种冰冷的平静攥住了我。

平静地回家，

平静地洗澡，

平静地坐在电脑前，

屏幕突然模糊了，看不清了，好像听到爸爸说，哟哟哟，真丑，快擦擦。

平静地合上电脑，

平静地躺在床上，

我一直在替你看看这个你曾喜欢过的世界，

也一直在想你，直到你出现在我的梦里。

眼前骤然清晰。

湿漉漉的柏油路面反着冷光，对面巨大的红色刹车灯刺得瞳孔一缩。

刚才那铺天盖地的绚烂，像被一块脏抹布瞬间抹去，连一丝水痕都没留下。

刚才那轻飘飘的悬空感消失得无影无踪，沉重的头盔重新压在脖子上，屁股下电动车的坐垫硌得难受，胃里空得发慌。

绿灯亮了，

你活着的时候，每一天都在离我远去。

你走了之后，我活着的每一天，都是在向你走去。

所以我拧着油门向前走，重复昨天的生活。

希望我们再见时，可以向你讲述沿途风景，讲述我感受到的世界与爱。

也希望你在那边一切都好。

在星空的另一端，思念从未停止。

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